This is the last photo I shot of my mother. In fact it was the last time I saw her. It’s not an image I display in my house but it is an important image. It is the only photo I took of her while she was ill. I couldn’t photograph her. I wish I had and yet I was afraid and in denial.
As you notice her battle wounds around her neck you will see that she was a cancer survivor. I say survivor because she did die cancer free. Although the treatment may have taken her physical strength and the ability to fight a massive heart attack, to me and to her…she won her battle. Both mentally and spiritually.
She was one tough cookie and it was one of the things I admire most about her. She had a level of will power, courage and grace that I will never have.
As with many mother daughter relationships we fought. Sometimes a lot. It was not a perfect relationship by any means and it carried with it baggage thru the years. Strangely it’s what brought us closer together. We were real and honest with each other, maybe too much. And we were vulnerable. She was the person I called first. The person I shared all my insecurities with. The person I shared all my joys and dreams and hopes with first. She was my best friend and no matter what she loved me.
I didn’t always appreciate this. And I have many regrets for things done and not done. Things said and not said.
So, with that….call your mother. Call her often. Spend as much time with her as you can. Not just for this day…because when she is gone- you will miss her-no matter how flawed or perfect she may be.
